If Little Man Can Do It.....So Can Mommy.

Better late than never right? Right.

So, the doctor came in and Sam and I grilled him for some answers. Well we did our best. Answers were slightly elusive, and he just kept saying we had to control my diet. Well, my diet IS controlled. Its the insulin that needs the fixin'. All my meals are planned out by a dietitian, and I eat almost the same thing every day. He also said the Baby may have to stay in longer than expected and that they probably won't even check to see if his lungs are mature until maybe 38 weeks. 38 weeks. I swear to Goodness, I can't wait that long. So I told the baby if he feels the need to come out a little earlier than that, FINE. Babies born as early as 34 weeks are pretty much just fine. And I don't want to have to try and deliver a 12 pound baby. That would kill me. My body is NOT strong enough for that. He is just over 3 pounds right about now, and I can barely stand the weight of him now. What can I say I am a weakling. Plus I long to have him here SO bad. I can hold out a little while longer, but I think more than 8 weeks is a stretch, especially with as bad as my sugars are now. Inside my body is not a great place for him. I told the doctor that I am concerned that since being admitted my sugar has run almost consistently high. This could kill our son. Which the doc acknowledges, but then goes back to the diet issue, like nothing is wrong with the insulin. I was on lantus before and it made my sugars just as nuts. Thats what they switched me to NPH to begin with. So much crap.

Thankfully I have a great support effort out there. Internet and phone support from my friends and family is awesome. Joe and his Jamie came to see us today. And of course Sam. He is the most amazing person. I would not be able to handle all this were it not for him. And the baby, I figure if Little Man can keep on fighting, and has made it this far despite the odds, then we are not screwing up as bad as they make us feel we are. He's an amazing little guy, and I love him so much.

I miss my Bubba terribly. I got to talk to him on the phone tonight, he purred at me.

Well thats all for now. Any questions? Just ask. Its cool.